Gabe, Romy And Jewel by Gary O. Bennett
INT. DRESSING ROOM/LOUNGE
GABE, ROMY and JEWEL sit around Gabe’s apartment studying
their respective lines from a play in which they have all
been cast.
GABE
I can’t believe we’re all in a play
together.
JEWEL
I don’t want to rub this in your faces
girls, but it’s pretty clear I have the
most developed character in the play.
ROMY
It’s a good thing for you because you’d
be lost without everything spelled out
for you.
JEWEL
What’s that supposed to mean?
ROMY
I’m joking.
JEWEL
No you’re not. I want to know what you
meant by that remark.
GABE
She didn’t mean anything. Let’s talk
about the play, OK?
JEWEL
I don’t want to talk about the play. I
want to talk about Romy’s attitude.
You’ve had something up your butt all
week.
ROMY
You want to know what it is? You want to
know what it is?
JEWEL
Yeah.
GABE
Jewel, you don’t want to know what it is.
JEWEL
Keep out of this, Gabe.
ROMY
I’ll tell you what it is. It’s this
superior attitude you have about your
acting.
GABE
She doesn’t mean “superior” in a negative
way.
ROMY
Oh, it’s negative alright.
JEWEL
Did you say “superior”?
ROMY
I said “superior” as in conceited, stuck
up, egotistical and self-important.
GABE
Maybe you want to rephrase that, Romy.
JEWEL
No, Romy here has made herself perfectly
clear. And I would add, she is
surprisingly astute.
GABE
She is?
JEWEL
Yes. It is surprising for your typical
self-indulgent Strasberg actor to have
such a discerning eye.
GABE
She doesn’t mean “self-indulgent”?
JEWEL
The simple fact is, I am superior.
GABE
You mean superior as an actor…not
everything.
ROMY
You agree with this egomaniac?
GABE
No. Yes…well…
ROMY
OK, so you want to hear the truth, huh?
Is that it? Well let me tell you the
truth. It’s going to hurt, Jewel, but
being your best friend, I need to tell
you.
GABE
I thought we were best…
ROMY
All you learned over there at Stella’s
studio was big, big, big, big…which is
only useful if your character’s making
love, crying over a dead baby or running
from a dinosaur. Otherwise, you Adler
actors are about as intimate as a
rhinoceros.
GABE
Romy, do you hear yourself?
JEWEL
See, you don’t know what you’re talking
about. You are talking from
ignorance…which is one of the
attributes of Strasberg, isn’t it. Stay
stupid…learn nothing about the real
world…never read a book or go to the
library…just do some psychobabble
exercises to dredge up some feeling which
is totally irrelevant to the play.
GABE
Maybe you two should stop yelling and
start listening to each other.
ROMY
Oh what the hell do you know. What’s
that studio you’re in…Mizner?
GABE
Meisner.
ROMY
Mizner, Meisner…it’s all the same.
what’s that inane theatre game you play,
repetition. What a waste of time.
JEWEL
So there’s something we agree on.
GABE
Now wait a second. You guys don’t know
anything repetition.
JEWEL
It has nothing to do with the world.
ROMY
It has nothing to do with emotion.
GABE
The hell with the world…the hell with
emotion…it has to do with the truth of
the moment.
ROMY
That’s what these Mizner actors always
say.
GABE
Meisner.
JEWEL
Yeah, they act with their eyes, not with
their heart.
GABE
This is ridiculous. This is ridiculous.
I’m not sure we should do this play
together.
ROMY
What’s the matter with you? We’re having
a discussion.
JEWEL
Yeah. Can’t you take a little
disagreement?
ROMY
Can’t you hear the subtext.
JEWEL
Yeah, the subtext. What subtext?
ROMY
Our affection for each other.
JEWEL
Yeah.
GABE
I don’t hear it.
ROMY
Well, you should listen harder.
JEWEL
Maybe you should do one of those
repeating things.
ROMY
It’s called repetition. Show a little
respect, Jewel.
JEWEL
Yeah. Repetition.
Romy and Jewel return to their play. Gabe sits there staring
off at nothing, lost in thought.
THE END.
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